Domestic violence sucks

by Samantha Shafran

April 10, 2008

“HE always says sorry the next day, and that he didn’t mean it, but it always happens again,” says Sarah who does not want her real name revealed for fear of retribution.

National Stop Domestic Violence Day, on April 24, will draw attention to women who suffer domestic violence. The 2005 ABS Personal Safety Survey estimates just over a third of female domestic  violence victims report it.

 “I feel bad telling people, like you, that it was abuse, but it was” Sarah says.

She still feels awkward revealing her private life, saying she never really discusses it with anyone.

 “He didn’t hit me or anything like that,” Sarah concedes. “[It was] just pushing and arguing.”

The ABS survey found women aged under 35 experience greater levels of violence than older women. Sarah agrees it’s common for young women to be abused in relationships, knowing that some of her friends were in the same situation as her.

She says everyone tells you to “get out” and leave, but in reality it’s much harder because you always think it’s your fault.

Surprisingly, Sarah still sticks up for her ex-boyfriend, saying it’s very hard to leave a relationship when you think “there’s no one else but him”.

“Usually I was always forgiving,” she said.

She always listened to his ‘sorrys’, but when it finally got too much she told him he needed help and it was his problem now. Sarah thinks he’ll probably never get help, even after a swag of promises.

“I reckon it’s easy to get sucked in,” she says.